Ever had the feeling of being so lost?Ever found yourself wandering aimlessly with nowhere to go?

I was stuck – trapped inside the pits of confusion and self-doubt. Retarded. Thoughts of negativity and depression ruled my mind as every opportunity passed before my eyes – untouched. I was shouting inside. Nobody heard me. Or maybe I did not want to be heard.

It was difficult – finding that voice. And finding someone to share it with. But as days passed, I saw that what paths I might’ve chosen, what mistakes I might’ve made – I learned.

And now, I may still be wandering, but not lost as before. Not only did I find someone, but I discovered an audience.

I now have my voice. I’m stepping out. I’m not stuck anymore.

About the Video: I shot part of this video 2 years ago at the Quezon City Circle, helping out some Mass Communication students. Although I did not direct and write this short, it’s still pretty special to me for it is the FIRST film I edited (in Windows Movie Maker). The moment I laid music on this piece, I knew I was made to do this. I saw things differently – how silly or simple or corny stuff maybe. So watch out for the obvious glitches in editing; plot holes are not my fault. Haha.

Sometimes, we don’t need to speak to be heard. I may not say this that much but thank you very much for hearing Coy out for the past 5 months.

And now it’s time to take an indefinite leave.

That’s a wrap!

Photo by: Chris Lagman

Music by: Bamboo

Each and every one of us is a gold mine; but like any other of its kind, you have to dig out the good substance.The Gold Mine Theory – this is what stuck to me upon finishing last Saturday’s PETA Tour. This principle states that every person has this infinite potential to excel on any activity as long as they get the proper education and have the very determination to do so.

The blogging group included Arpee, Martin, Kai, Jun, Diego, Melissa, Carla, Benj, Cielo, Jeff , Joe, Coy, Chris, Faith, Karla, and Gibbs.

With this thought I just realized, I can be whoever I want to be. Just like playing a character in a play, you can be anyone if you just put your mind to it. You can be Juliet, Plato, or even Rizal if you only internalize that character – which requires not only knowledge of the material but also the passion to believe that you can be.

So just like what Mrs. Cecille Garrucho explained, anybody can do theater. And from a similar point of view of Pepe, from PETA’s “Batang Rizal”, anybody can be a hero too.

“Kung walang pinagbago ang panahon mo sa panahon ko, bakit kailangan ko pang mamatay?” A daunting question made by our young national hero. I almost teared up that moment when he left the stage leaving everybody wondering the same thing. Did he indeed die for nothing? Does our present condition reflect what he was fighting against?

Silence waved through the place as Pepe’s question kept lingering in my mind. Honestly, as I was sitting there, dumbfounded by the query, I didn’t really know the answer. And I was scared to believe that it was, in reality, all for nothing.

But as the play neared its end, I got to realize that it was not really about what he died for, but how he lived his life. And if one boy had this one great vision for our country and brought it to realization, then what stops today’s youth of achieving the same greatness? With enough will and persistence, you and I can be a hero in our own right. And with that in mind, we can be our nation’s gold mine.

“…Sino ka sa kanila, sino ka?
Kahit bata ka pa dapat alam mo na.
Piliin ang landas hangga’t maaga
Tayong kabataan ang pag-asa ng bayan
Ika’y Pilipino ‘wag kalilimutan
Talino at lakas ialay mo sa bayan.”

Photos by: Gibbs Cadiz, Arpee Lazaro

Music by: Bamboo

Special Thanks to: Philippine Educational Theater Association (PETA), PinoyCentric, and Gibbs Cadiz

I’ve been vlogging for 4 months now and you might have noticed a constant face in all of my videos and photos. He’s got more exposure than I do in most of my episodes. I’ve featured my Mom and Dad here in CokskiBlue; it’s about time to give (part of) the spotlight to the fourth and last member of the family. Yup. He’s Jet – my (not so) little brother. He’ll kill me once he sees this. Ha!It’s not really hard to have fun with this guy. He thinks of the corniest jokes and belches out very funny stories every now and then about his friends, misadventures and UP. He’s a very shy and laid-back person but he comes up with the quirkiest comments that everybody loves.

Kids (?) our age usually bond over basketball or over bottles of beer and pulutan. We bond over this:

Oh, did I mention I sang in this video?

Someone had asked me this week if my english-dominant script on my last vidcast, The Hit List, was intentional. Well, yeah, kinda. Because I’m about to drown you in serious Tagalog this week. Haha.Ehem.

Ayan. Narinig niyo na ba ang balita tungkol kay Malu Fernandez – ang manunulat mula sa Manila Standard Today at People Asia Magazine na sumulat ng mga pagmamatang salita laban sa ating mga OFWs? Alay ko sa kanya ang bidyo na inyong mapapanood sa ibaba. At sapagkat hindi ko pa kayang gumawa ng sanaysay ukol sa Wika at Sex dahil sa aking inaalagaang imahe (ano kamo?), narito muna ang aking inihandang talumpati para sa Wika 2007 ng PinoyBlogosphere.com. At hulaan ninyo kung anong taon ko ito sinimulan (Clue: Hindi 2007) :

Akin itong isinulat ilang taon na ang nakalipas. May pinagbago ba?Pilipinas…Philippines — ano ang pagkakaiba? Ano ang mas kaaya-aya sa ating pandinig? Katulad nga ng nakasaad sa kasabihan, “Ang rosas sa kahit anong pangalan ay patuloy pa ring hahalimuyak.” Iyan din ang ating bayan. Iyan ang tinaguriang Perlas ng Silanganan. Bawat Pilipino’y taas-noo sa harap ng mga dayuhan…

Ngunit bakit? Bakit parang ang laki na ng pinagbago? Ating pagsasalita’y linigaw na ng ating dila. Parang nawala na sa ating mga puso ang ating pagka-Pilipino. Ang iba diyan ay pasosyal-sosyal pa. Halatang ikinahihiya ang kayumangging balat sa iba. Minsan ay hindi ka na talaga makapaniwala sa mga naririnig. Wala nang paggalang ang lumalabas sa kanilang mga bibig. Mapapatanong ka na lamang: Ano na nga ba ang mga nangyayari? Wala na ba tayong ibang maisip kung hindi ang sarili? Paano na ang bansa nagluwal sa atin? Huwag ninyong sabihing ang Pilipinas ay palubog na kasama natin.

Oo nga’t may mga wikang banyaga na lubos nating kailangan. Para sa kaunlaran ng bansa, ito’y dapat ring matutunan. Ngunit kung ito’y lubusan nang ipapalit sa ating maraming wika, mas maganda nang maghirap kaysa dangal ang mawala. Ipakita naman natin ang ating pagpapahalaga… upang ang kinabukasan ng Pilipinas ay tingalain ng ibang bansa.

Apparently, The Top Ten Emerging Influential Blogs of 2007 writing project is still making quite a buzz and waves of stories across our very own Pinoy Blogosphere Blogging Community – but for very different reasons and from very different perspectives.Oh well, let’s all take a break from that guys. Chill. And remember the good times that was August 1, 2007. Come on, just spare this ten minutes. For peace.

Yeah right. Haha.

I always liked to become a disk/video jockey. Tell me if I should stop trying. Haha.

The Vlinks:

The Top Ten Emerging Influential Blogs of 2007
FOBCAST – Third World Tech Talk and a lot of dicking around (“Top 10…” Podcast)
Ethical Blogging
Yuga Meets the Kid Blogger
A Month of Blog Scandals and Wars

The blog personalities: Ma’am Janette, Gibbs, Dine, Rick, Ederic, Benj, Jeff, Poytee, Tess, Jake, Shari, Alan, Kevin, Jhed, Rens, Carl, Allen, Elmo, Karlo, Arbet, Marcelle.

Pictures by: Shari, Alan, Dine, Poytee, Rick, Ederic, Gibbs, Yes Payment, Digital Filipino

Videos by: Coy

Music by: Arkarna, Number One Gun, Session Road

The movie sucked. Yep, it did. And even with all the buzz, the songs weren’t that good either.

Until this happened.

Yeah, the movie still blows. But there’s something about High School Musical On Stage that saved Disney’s sorry excuse for a movie. This even got me to download (illegally) the whole damn soundtrack album! What has got into me? Or maybe the question is, what mojo has Stages and Trumpets Playshop conjured that’s making all this noise(LSS in my head)?

Oh, it was just pure talent then. That works.

Photos from: Click The City, Super Bong, Gibbs Cadiz, Coy, Pinoy Centric

Music from: High School Music OST

I did not expect that.

I’m not the biggest Harry Potter fan but this is just too good to pass up.

I know there’s a lot of rumors surrounding the final book installment, “Deathly Hallows”, so you be the judge with this.

Watch it. It’s really special.

What can you say? Pretty good, huh?

Ms. Janette Toral’s writing project, The Top Ten Emerging Influential Blogs in 2007, has received a sudden surge of new entries recently. A great number of bloggers in the pinoy blogosphere has searched, bloghopped, and now has listed their very own nominations. Many others are still rushing to make their own before the deadline of submission of entries this coming Saturday, July 28, 5:00 PM (GMT +8).

And I’ve noticed, a lot of participants have been in campaign mode for the past week. Paolo Mendoza tagged ten bloggers to make their own list, Jhed Cabrera has posted an article about being influential, and even Benj Espina started vlogging to put the message across. Now, as a way to promote the writing project, I’ve put up a countdown before the deadline:

1. You’ll get the chance to win 100 freakin’ dollars! Nevermind the exchange rate. That’s still date money you got there.
2. You’ll get a free pass to attend the upcoming bloggers’ meet-up this coming August 1, at Max’s Restaurant, Park Square 1, Makati City, 6-9 PM. You just need to confirm here.
3. You’ll get to spread the link love, help your favorite blogs to gain recognition and expose your site as well in the process.

What do you got to lose? Nada. So JOIN NOW!For the meantime, check-out my own VIDEO ENTRY for the project. I’ve added a few effects for your second (or third) viewing. I highly recommend these ten blogs to be included in your list.

And if my blog, in some way, has sparked your interest in video blogging, then I’m also asking for your support in the writing project and in spreading the word. Or better yet, just keep coming back and let’s keep in touch. Your comments and insights on my videos have always been an inspiration.

CLICK FOR YOUTUBE VERSION

Now you couldn’t click the links in the vid, could you?

Happy Slip | Utak Gago | Fire Eye’d Boy | The Dork Factor | Gibbs Cadiz | Pinoy Blogero | Green Pinoy | Project Manila | Komikero’s Video Channel | CokskiBlue

Good luck to all the nominees!Music by: Fall-Out Boy

P.S. If you want to embed this video on your blog, just let me know.

DO NOT RECORD A PODCAST WHILE WATCHING PINOY BIG BROTHER.

I have stopped watching the show after a month of its second season run. It started out pretty interesting. The first few tasks were challenging enough to keep viewers glued. Man, there were even some episodes which I could actually consider worthy of wasting my time. But I don’t know. I just stopped. I have very low tolerance in keeping up with what’s happening in my life let alone follow 14 strangers wiggle their asses, take regular bathroom breaks and talk about the latest in-house chika.

Even with all the Wendy buzz just a week ago, I displayed minimal interest in its final week. Man, did I haaate HER. But no matter how bitchy she got, it didn’t urge me to call her names like “Wendy-monyo” in public online forums; just made me wish she got trampled by the chicks she was running with in the recent Lovapalooza commercial.

So when I learned that she shockingly made it to the finals, I knew I had to watch her get the worst booing of her life in Araneta.

As we watch the BIG NIGHT countdown clock at channel 2 boil down to minutes, my friends and I were still busy brewing and finalizing a master plan for our friend, Abe’s surprise 21st birthday bash. I just owe this guy a lot. We just met last November around MY 21st birthday and he helped with most of the planning, ambiance, lights, music, all for FREE! My party was a smash hit mostly because of his doing. So, with high gratitude, I would like this party to be smoking hot as well.

Starting the Podcast

We were basically running out of new ideas. We don’t want a rerun of what happened at my gig, that wouldn’t be a surprise, would it. Got no time to record a video let alone edit one. So we thought, as a simple gift, instead of just the usual house music, we’ll also be playing a podcast all through out the party – a personalized radio show. Brilliant.

Now that was our first mistake. Ha!

We started as PBB was already announcing the 4th big placer. We had to record during commercials since being hardcore addicts, Jhossa (a Wendy fan in denial) and Bits insisted on keeping the TV on while we do our business. Now that was another mistake.

The recording was all over the place! Everybody was talking over each other, there was no real flow (thanks Tanggera), and even worse, it was smothered with countless off-topic PBB adlibs and spiels! The joy of having Wendy kicked out was evident in the podcast but as we moved on, I just had to steer the conversation out of PBB’s way. I don’t know if you can tell but I was “trying” to be on-topic as my co-DJs ramble like crazy. Haha.

But what the heck. It was really fun anyway. It was our their first time for crying out loud. We made it in one take with no editing. And everybody got to go home as PBB rolled the credits.

Oh, and the Party?

Massive success. Although not because of our ingenuity in organizing events but because of Abe’s band, Mainstream, with their pretty hot vocalist, Tina (who, by the way, they call “Du-Wendy”, haha!). Everybody got to hear the podcast, and all they understood was “Happy Birthday Aaaaabe!” Bummer.

Now here is the podcast. Edited to spare you the agony. It isn’t that bad. Really. Heh. Tell me what you think.

P.S. To everyone who’s thinking I’ve jumped the shark with this one, don’t worry, I’ll make up for it next week. Haha!

And thanks Dad, for thinking highly of my “reputation”. Don’t stress, I’ll take care of it.

Man, I’ve got the worst hangover.

Of summer, that is. Since classes started this June, can’t seem to fully adjust to the new schedule I have to put up with. Maybe I miss the super hot days when I have no reason to leave the house or even get out of bed, the events we have to organize, or staring at the computer ’til dawn. It’s hard to focus on academics when Wifi can reach you almost everywhere and blog hopping could be as easy as a sit in the park. I need to let go.

So now, on the turn of a new month, I will firmly stand by my decision to leave behind (temporarily) some “luxuries” I had back then. Looking back, it’s been fun but I just have to think– Dude, you’re graduating dammit! — and that should shake me up and put my priorities in place.

Huling hirit na ‘to.

CLICK HERE FOR GOOGLE VIDEO

Photos by: Ching, Pao, Justin, Coy and Shari

Music by: Jason Mraz

Want more details about Coy’s summer? Check-out CokskiBlue‘s Summer ’07 Video Collection!